Men today think they have it harder than previous generations did
On the one hand, men are told to be thoughtful, caring, passionate, connected, fathering types. On the other hand they're still expected to be 'macho'... these conflicting messages as a major stressor for guys. Another reason it's tough for men today? They often can't look to their fathers as examples of what a man should be... 'Why bother doing that? My father did. Now he's divorced, my mother won't talk to him, he lives by himself...and he's unhappy."
Why they're waiting to settle down
"Physically, they can wait longer to have children later on [because of] medicine," says Wes Moore, who is a youth advocate, army combat veteran, business leader, and author of the best-selling book The Other Wes Moore. But he adds that it has a lot to do with how high women set the bar for someone with husband potential. "If a woman is looking for a man that is educated and has a good job and is chivalrous and prepared to be a husband, the number of guys that you can choose from is dwindling." Basically, Wes is saying that the men who do fit the bill have the upper hand because there's less competition. "If you happen to be a man who's in this category, you can afford to say, 'You know what? Why am I getting married at twenty-five?'"
They're becoming more and more OK with women with bigger paychecks
"Young men are not particularly troubled by the idea that their partners will bring in more money. In fact, they are much more likely to hope to have a partnership where maybe you're bringing in more money this year and he's bringing in more money next year," explained Kathleen Gerson, PhD, professor of sociology at New York University and chair of the Faculty of Arts and Science Gender Equity Committee. Young men are beginning to view it as a "long distance race," she adds, meaning they're more concerned with the big picture, i.e. being able to buy a house together, rather than who contributes how much. "They see that collaboration is better than having a power struggle."
But they can still feel threatened by your success
"Women are the making the decision to be both productive and reproductive," said Lionel Tiger, PhD, professor of anthropology at Rutgers University and author of several books, including The Decline of Males. And according to him, this can be hard on men. "The productive element for the male has been taken out from under him," which can leave a guy feeling not only that he has nothing to contribute, but also that he's not needed at all.
Bromances are good for them...and you